It was always in the little things you did.
The high wave over the heads of workers
when you spotted me across the shop.
It was the way you never said anything
but I felt you in your eyes.
It was the brisk, light-footed way you
walked; aerial, like gliding.
You looked like a handsome boy
all grown up in your business suits
trying very hard to win, to be the best
at whatever it was we were all doing.
I admired you, I trusted you, I loved you.
It was the familiarity of your voice
and the way your eyes sank into your soul.
I don't know if it was my sadness projected back
or your own, but I felt connected to you in an
unexplainable way, as if on another plane
we existed perfectly and understandably together.
But in the only realm we could know, years and years
passed without even the briefest glimpse into your soul.
Still, in my heart is where you stayed.
I believed one day you would finally see in me
what I saw in you, but that notion has come to an end;
a necessary acceptance that I was wrong.
Very wrong. And I would be wrong about
every other thing if I could be right about this.
To let go of what I hoped for for so long
brings me to tears each and every time I try.
But I am able to wipe them away quicker now.
I feel something there with me
coaxing me out of my sadness.
Maybe it's just me being all grown up
ready to accept this was one-sided and in my opinion
the worst account of unrequited love ever.
Ophelia did go absolutely mad though, so there is that.
Well, maybe it will all make sense in the next life.
Maybe we'll see each other there.
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